Published December 20, 2007
On Valentine's Day you were feeling a little lonely. I guess the commercialism of the day and Valentine's Day gifts around you, got to you. You told me something I found interesting: you are afraid of a romantic attachment because it would signal a loss of freedom and autonomy. Did you get this idea from watching your father and me? I certainly hope not.
Marriage does not mean the loss of autonomy.
Marriage means becoming part of a unit. With children, the size of this unit grows. It may not be run along democratic lines-indeed, ours is not-but belonging to our family unit means that there are three people who care for you more than anyone else. We expect the same in return.
So, my dear, do not fear romantic attachments. One may be the start of your own family unit. Your marriage will be completely different from mine. You will have more choices. You will also not be able to blame your husband if you make the wrong decisions. I taught you to think for yourself but not to put yourself first. I love you.